Thursday, March 25, 2010

Glitter!

I do love glitter (who doesn't?) Here are the reasons why I love glitter:

1. I am a girl
2. It makes boring stuff un-boring
3. It is sparkly

But today my love of glitter increased because a bubbly little 3-year-old was dancing around me and sang this....

"I love glitter! I love glitter! It makes shit shine!"

I'm pretty sure she was just trying to say "It makes it shine" but the combination of an 's' at the end of the previous word and the 'sh' at the beginning of the next word made it impossible for her not to say shit...I mean it.

Friday, March 12, 2010

Laughable Moments

This week has been full of laughable moments and I'm here to share some of those moments with you, please to enjoy....

On Tuesday afternoon I was driving with my 2-year-old nephew and his most beloved stuffed panda in the car. For a solid 20 minutes Pratt and Panda had a conversation. Below is my favorite excerpt of the conversation: (imagine Panda's voice as a mixture of a squeaky little mouse and a kitten)

Pratt: "Hi Panda!"
Panda: "mew-mew-mew-MEW!"
Pratt: "What doin' Panda?"
Panda: "MEW-mew-MEW-mew-MEW."
Pratt: "Panda wanna snack?"
Panda: "Mew."
Pratt: "What want Panda?"
Panda: "Mew-Mew"
Pratt: "Oh. Panda want candy."
Panda: "Mew."
Pratt: (to me this time) "Dawn! Panda want candy!"
Me: "I don't have any candy."
Pratt: "OH MAN!"
Pratt: (back to Panda) "No candy Panda."
Panda: "MEW-mew-mew-mew-mew."
Pratt: "ok Panda," said in a reassuring tone as he gently cradled and and stroked Panda.

It was so adorable. Pratt doesn't even open his mouth when Panda "talks" so it is all the more believable. I was trying SO hard to not laugh because I didn't want him to be interrupted and stop.

Not long after this Pratt and I picked up his big sister, Emma, at the bus stop. I suggested we drive to the store to buy cupcake supplies and then head home to bake them. Both kids were excited, but as we drove Emma's comments took a turn for the worse:

Emma: "Dawn?"
Me: "Yes?"
Emma: "I need to tell you something."
Me: "Ok. What is it?"
Emma: "It's not me, like I SWEAR it's not me! But.....some people, not me!....but some people think you are really rude."
Me: "Oh really? Who are these people that think I am 'really rude'?"
Emma: "My friends."
Me: "Why do they think I am rude?"
Emma: "Well, they think you are rude 'cause you don't let me do stuff."
Me: "Oh. Well, I guess I'll just have to live with that."

Seriously, where did a 7-year-old learn "I SWEAR!" and when did she learn the 'blame bad things on your friends' bit? (for the record I am actually a really mean auntie and I don't let her do everything she wants to do and can often be heard telling her no, so I do understand that she, I mean some people, think I am really rude.)

In preschool this week I heard these comments:

Joseph: "Chris, can I use that block?"
Chris: "No."
Joseph: "Please?"
Chris: "Sorry no. This block says 'Jo-seph is al-ler-gic to this block' on it. So you can't use it 'cause you are allergic." (he very carefully tracked his finger along the imaginary words as he "read" them.)

Joseph strangely accepted this logic even though there is absolutely no writing on the block.


Sara was playing with the little people and said to the little people boy:

Sara: "Do you want to go to juvee?"
Little People Boy must have answered in her head because then she said, "Well, if you don't want to go to juvee then you need to do what I say."
Me: "What's 'juvee'?"
Sara: "Juvenile Detention. Bad kids go there."

Question: Where did a 5-year-old learn about "juvee"?
Answer: I have no idea and I'm not sure I want to know......


Luke: "Hey girls! Can I play at the kitchen with you?"
Grace: "Yes. You can be the daddy."
Lucy: "Yeah! And we will all be the mommies," gesturing to the three girls playing there.
Grace: "Here daddy, these are all your babies," handing Luke 4 baby dolls.

Do I really think they were playing 'polygamist family'? No, but it sure did sound like it.